God Laughed

Italy, 2012

The hand of God works in mysterious ways. Let's start with the fact that those who know me well, know that among my many faults and craziness is my complete and utter inability to be in the passenger seat of a car and let someone else drive. I become like a person possessed by a demon. A shrill voice (not mine) will start shrieking "look out!! CAR!!!", or "watch out the truck is turning!!!" or the firm favorite "slow DOWN!!!!" all at decibel levels the human ear was not meant to tolerate.

To have me as a passenger one needs to be deaf and have nerves of steel. I HAVE to be in the driver's seat. (Control issues? Me? Nah!) Let us state that as a given prerequisite for world peace.

Having said all that, my man and I touched down in the land of pasta and pizza for 7 days of vacation time, to soak up the quiet beauty of the Italian lakes, majestic mountains and the rolling green of Tuscany.

We went to pick up our car on arrival at Milan airport. We hand over our passports and international drivers licences (which I had rushed to get). The guy behind the desk asks for our regular licenses. My husband whips his out of his wallet, and I start to stammer and sweat. My licence is safely tucked away with my i.d. in my handbag.

At home.

The rental guy looks at me and calmly says, "that's ok, you may not drive at all, but HE can drivel."

I obviously did not hear that so he repeated it. I cannot drive? ME?!? Not DRIVE? Was he totally insane??!!! This cannot be happening to me! A whole week at someone else’s mercy??!!! How will I survive? How will he survive ME as a passenger?

On the Milan highway travelling at a mere 120 km an hour, with semitrailers whizzing past and cutting in and out at 160km an hour, my husband became deaf to my shrieks and gasps.

I prayed-for strength to be calm and to shut my mouth, and to breathe- all at the same time.

And G-d laughed....all the way through Italy.

I could almost hear Him say "Gotcha!"

#travel #vacations